On the Morning of the 19. July 2016 sparked Lance Hart, 57, a Ticket for the car Park of the “Castle Sports Complex” in Spalding, Lincolnshire. He parked his Toyota Aygo next to a small silver-colored Hyundai, opened the trunk, took out a gun, and waited for his wife, Claire, 50, and daughter Charlotte, 19, until they returned from their morning Swim. Hart pulled the trigger from a short distance and shot himself. His wife Claire was killed instantly, Charlotte lived a few minutes. Your last sentence was: “My father shot at us.”

that Morning, Luke and Ryan sat Hard, both engineers in the Oil industry, in their offices. Luke’s in Aberdeen, Ryan in Rotterdam. Both received on their Smartphones, a message to the BBC – “Three Dead in shooting in Spalding”. And both began a terrible idea. Her mother and her sister lived there, they were only moved out a few days earlier from the house of Lance Hart, the tyrannical and manipulative husband and father. Luke and Ryan were trying to reach her mother and sister, they talked on the phone with friends and relatives. They suspected and hoped but.

Ryan reached a good friend who said: “Come home, my friend.”

Two and a half years have passed since the murders of her mother and her sister. For a year they were numb from the pain. Meanwhile, the two live together in front of the gates of London. They have together written “Operation Lighthouse”, a book about domestic violence and control forced. They give lectures, travel around the country, tell the story of your family, and call for a interpret the signs in a timely manner. “Because we have failed to do.” On a rainy winter day, Luke, 29, and Ryan, 27, sitting in the living room of their small house in Feltham, West London. Around them, the dogs Indi and Bella scurry. They belonged to her sister.

Luke, Ryan, and the murders of her mother and her sister are now more than two years. How has he changed your life?

Ryan: We both wanted a better life for Claire and Charlotte. This was, for many years, our drive, and we worked hard. We drove almost every weekend to go home. As they were dead, lacked this Motivation. Nothing had more sense. I wondered at the time, very seriously: Why am I existing?

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mother, Claire, (R) and daughter Charlotte Hart had just moved out from the family home in the village of Moulton, Lance Hart in 2016 in a Parking lot

©Collect/Luke & Ryan shot Hard

Luke: One year we spent after the murder in the small house we had just rented for our mother and sister, all of the personal things of rum were still there. It was like the movie “Groundhog day”. It all collapsed. We took care of each other. I believe that we now have found a purpose in life. By trying to explain to people what can happen if you recognize the warning signs. For us, this veil was torn away, and we could suddenly see clearly.

Ryan: It feels like a constructive pain. Add to this the fact that Our father also wanted to ruin our lives. If we had allowed it, he would have won in the end.

you can now warn others against the consequences of domestic violence.

Luke: For us, this was a way to find out what actually happened. As a therapy, it is not in vain a Form that reflects his life through narrative. Why kill someone’s family? It looked almost as if the murders had come out of nowhere. We had previously seen no signs of physical violence. Our father was an incredible control freak. The abuse starts with control, that we know today. At that time we did not know that. Violence is the ultimate means of control.

you have triggered with your warnings, obviously. Or better said: not triggered.

Luke: A woman in Lincolnshire mind, that she and the children were bullied by her husband for years. Not physically, but mentally. She left him, and the police found out that he was indeed on the threshold, his family would be killed. This happened around the corner, about a year after the murder of our mother and sister. We’re anything other than a tragic case. Many families do not realise in what great danger you are in.

Ryan: We had no idea. We had not planned the move of our mother and sister in the Faith, you might happen to terrible. But so that you could finally live a free life. Hundreds of thousands of similar. It is the invisible, the lost life, which may not be extinguished, but never in freedom can exist. Well that’s about it.

The statistics are indeed alarming. The police recorded the 2017 in England and Wales alone, 1.3 million cases of domestic violence.

Luke: We often speak, and rightly so, of the many refugees in Europe. But we have to do it in any country with such refugees, women and children, to flee their violent men. And, in the worst case would be killed, if they dared. The number of women in this country are killed by their partners, is higher than that of the fallen British soldiers in Afghanistan and Iraq. The home is a place of violence. We live in a democracy. But in many house pure reigns to keep dictatorship. The laws fail at the front door.

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The brothers with the little sister, Charlotte, during a family holiday. Early on, they tried to escape to the father as often as possible.

©Collect/Luke & Ryan Hard

led Yes initially a reasonably normal life. When did you first realize that something is wrong?

Luke: That took a while. Our Childhood was almost idyllic, at least for the first ten years. Although we were poor, lived on the Land and played outside. We were able to escape the father often. Then we moved to a village, our mother, the father had to work also. At the time, he felt, apparently, a lack of control. And now it was worse. As children and teenagers we thought he was just an ill-humored, bad man, the our father is stupid. But we considered him dangerous. He has built up, finally, gradually, his coordinate system, and everything that was not triggered immediately tantrums.

Can you give an example?

Ryan: It was the small things. If the garbage cans were not on the road or no water for the tea in the kettle, and that was enough. My mother drank a coffee with a colleague and gave three pounds for it. After that, he flipped out completely and said: “Other men would punch you in the face.” I believed that most of the men were so. Only later at the University I realized that it was true.

you had friends at school. Have said nothing?

Luke: When we had a visit, acted like he was completely different. He could adjust well. We thought that the world is dual, and therefore, this “doctor Jekyll and Mister Hyde”behavior.

Ryan: And we developed natural protection mechanisms.

what were they Like?

Luke: It alone does not allow it to escalate. And we shifted our energy to another: the school and Sport. We learned to repress our father in the utmost corner of our head. Even as he began, our mother, more or less, to chain.

What do you mean with chaining?

Ryan: His control. He was on the phone, for example, the numbers on the phone to our mother. In the year before her death, we bought her a Smartphone and were able to communicate with her via Whatsapp. You could see his concern. The idea that he had everything completely under control, made him crazy. The Smartphone was their gateway to freedom. For 26 years she had no Chance to escape. We were able to say nothing to our mother, without that he would have noticed it.

Luke: We were both early out of the house. The study was like a salvation. I wanted to earn as soon as possible. And with this money, we wanted to get Mum and Charlotte from hell.

Ryan: And it was a hell, in retrospect. If you took home something wrong, rum, he rode out, for weeks, months and sometimes years.

Could you be more specific?

Ryan: I was, unlike Luke, not a wish for a child and believe that my father loathed me for it. Sometimes, he said: “You have acne, look at you you only. You look disgusting. How can you go to school?” He wanted to see you suffer, which he enjoyed. I saw a spider phobia since I was as a child, a horror film with spiders. My mother said: “do it!” What he said: “no, the Kid should see this.” To him, the consequences were clear. He even wanted to have control over our Fears.

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As a wife Claire should be Hard in subjection to your husband, Lance – asked for his view of the world

©Collect/Luke & Ryan Hard

Luke: I would be at this control addiction almost died, as I later learned. I suffered as a child under a peanut Allergy. The father knew of course. And fed it to me as a small child however with peanut butter, which was dangerous to life. That was his perverse way, to signal to my mother that he could even decide about life and death. His goal was to spread uncertainty. If you’re someone insecure, you will choke the Rebellion in the Bud. What gave him even more control. That was his diabolical game.

both of you, your sister and your mother grew up in close. He felt excluded at some point?

Ryan: That may be. His idea of family was completely wrong-headed. He believed that we are obliged to serve him. So he saw that too with our mother. The marriage certificate for him was like a free ride.

Luke: He looked at the family as a company with a dominant Boss, middle Management and the workers. However, with no rights for the workers.

Ryan: He had us, he had no friends – except on the Internet. He went in the forums, as he played. It was a fairy-tale world. Because he got what he wanted, in the real world, he escaped into the Virtual.

do you Believe that his own Childhood has made her father to this people?

Luke: Probably Yes. Although he rarely spoke about it. His father was in the Navy, and his wife, our grandmother, was her husband willingly give. They moved around the world, with a very traditional understanding of roles. My hypothesis is that he took this very Patriarchal image of the woman as an unpaid slave. This was his pattern.

Ryan: He tried to shape us according to his masculine Ideal. He never came to school, never. But he had to us a connection to our sister. He was not able to construct no System, to Charlotte, because he understood the Feminine. The scared the hell out of him literally. If you challenged him, he looked at you like an alien. He didn’t understand it …

Luke: … because he had no emotional language, except anger. And for us, too, he could feel no empathy, because we shared his masculine values. If one of us had been gay, would it have been for him a Disaster.

a Lot of what was going on in him, he tightly held on to in the diaries.

Ryan: Yes. On hundreds of pages. He was a health fanatic. He wrote that even how many times he went to the bathroom. And he wrote about us and our mother. He made us for his misfortune. Later, he had prostate cancer. He made the Stress responsible. And for the Stress, in turn, he made us responsible.

Luke: With the disease, his behavior was even worse. Because our mother had Multiple sclerosis, and fell ill to cancer. That made him angry. I remember that I What’s going on him in the kitchen screamed at her, “the Fuck is wrong with you?” And suddenly, his Habitus changed: From this anger was something almost Fearful, and he said: “Everybody’s on my back.” He saw himself really as a victim. I said to him: “You need professional help.”

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daughter Charlotte, who loved animals, remained Lance Hart foreign. But also for his sons, he felt no empathy, because they shared his masculine values.

©Collect/Luke & Ryan Hard

Ryan: was sitting How deeply this Destructive in him, we had no idea. I think the fundamental Problem was: We didn’t understand him.

That sounds like a Romanesque revival-of-control compulsion. Both of you are not convinced, nonetheless, that your father in the traditional sense was mentally ill. What makes you so sure?

Ryan: The talk about the sick Psyche diluted in this case, the problem. What that 19. July 2016 happened corresponded exactly to the world of our father. He was pure. He killed with cold-blooded precision. We had our mentallys problems, and I think we can see a difference. Luke: What we often hear, and experience, when men kill, is a trivialization. But it is nothing more than a Form of terrorism against women and children. We tend to ignore the underlying ideology, by declaring it a disease. This is too cheap. Much to cheap.

What ideology are you referring to?

Luke: Our father drove the traditionally-masculine belief system on the top. He was not psychotic, but rather ideologically driven. Many women are tormented by their husbands and killed, but not so many men of their women. This is like an iceberg, you only see the tip of the jutting out of a sea of ignorance. Think about it, how often do you such a crime to read, mental health problems or the loss of a job would have helped. This is called a trivialising of “murder in the heat of passion”. But read the almost invariably about men. There are excuses for men. Not for women. Our father led a Patriarchal crusade against us. But sick he was.

Ryan: The police found a very detailed, twelve-page long Letter on his USB-Stick.

He had this written almost as a open letter …

Ryan: Exactly. In it, he described his, as he called it, “the Last supper”, red wine and Paella, accused our mother, to have his life destroyed, and therefore he will now destroy yours. Revenge is like a meal that you serve best cold. And besides, he instructed the police, please enter the door.

Luke: it’s Unbelievable. He solved the murder even a Parking ticket. Who does that? And he did remember to pay the Rates for the fridge and the lease car to be returned. The affect is? In the Write also: “I am violent.” And then he brings his wife and daughter. I could puke.

Ryan: I think he was really convinced to be a model citizen.

you know today, that he wanted to kill you, too.

Ryan: Yes, that’s what he wanted. 18 days before that, he had googled about men who kill their families. And he read these stories from the “lonely wolves”, of the lone wolves. From this, he puzzled his own story.

Luke: He wanted to kill us at home. He often snuck at night in order to three of our family house. And we thought: is again on his Trip. Today, we believe that he was planning at the time, as he would kill us. He made it for months and prepared for the Moment. We are lucky that we are still alive.

For the ordeal went after the murders, as the media wrote, the case workers and a tabloid newspaper, the murders were because of his personal hardships to understand …

Luke: This article was the worst. You have taken in the meantime from the network. But that is what we mean with old role models: the assumption that the motives for such murders are understandable. People were interviewed who said that our father was a good man. People who didn’t know him at all. About him in the Newspapers about as much as Nelson Mandela after his death. What contempt for the victims! Absolutely crazy.

you, Ryan, said that they have a problem with women. Out of fear, you might become like your father?

Ryan: no, that’s why not. When I came to Uni, I had to get acquainted with plenty of opportunities for women. But I wanted to take care of my mother and Charlotte. A girlfriend would have been a hindrance, you would not have understood it probably.

And today?

Ryan: I must learn that I am good enough for someone. This is not easy, when you get to listen to 25 years of your father: “There are a lot Better than you.” I have to accept it. Succeed slowly. But it will take time.

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