Thursday, October 1, 2020

‘X-Men: Dark Phoenix’ on HBO: All It Took Was a Quarantine to Make This Movie Worth Watching

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I have not seen this weekend’s big HBO movie, X-Men: Dark Phoenix. So why, you may be wondering, have I been tasked with writing the “Hey, X-Men: Dark Phoenix is on HBO” post? It’s because I am not only the biggest X-Men fan at Decider, but the biggest X-Men fan you now know (unless you personally know Jay and Miles, I guess). I’m currently writing this while holed up in my home office, in front of a literal wall of X-Men comics, posters, action figures, statues, Pizza Hut cups, and yes, even pogs. I’ve spent 27 years spending money on all of this stuff, but I couldn’t spend the money to see X-Men: Dark Phoenix in theaters? That’s a sign, y’all.

After those dire reviews rolled in, I figured I didn’t need to see another bad adaptation of my favorite X-Men story ever (do I already own “The Dark Phoenix Saga” comics in six different formats? Yes, yes I do). Instead, I rewatched the ’90s animated series’ take on it, an adaptation that absolutely rips even by 2020 standards. Hell, I even got major “Dark Phoenix” vibes from Chilling Adventures of Sabrina! Why in the world do I need to watch a dulled down version of the story that, yet again, does not involve a highfalutin fetish club or a cadre of spandex-clad alien warriors? Sheesh!

dark-phoenix-movie
dark-phoenix-movie

But… my oh my, times have changed. I think I’ve finally found the perfect circumstances to finally watch X-Men: Dark Phoenix under: the Coronavirus quarantine that we’re all suffering through. Because honestly, compared to being trapped in my apartment, another X-movie that once again transfers all of the agency of the female characters present in the original text onto old white men doesn’t seem so bad! In fact, I’m so starved for new content and just something to do that the prospect of live-tweeting a film that I once vowed I would never suffer through seems exciting—even X-citing.

So that’s where I’m at and, if you also avoided this movie during its theatrical run, maybe that’s where you’re at too. Maybe HBO making this movie available to stream comes at just the right time, a time when we can set aside old grudges that seem incredibly trivial compared to [gestures outside his window]. I have no ill will towards X-Men: Dark Phoenix, not anymore. And I’m ready to livetweet the hell outta this trainwreck.

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Teodora Torrendohttps://www.ccdiscovery.com
Teodora Torrendo is an investigative journalist and is a correspondent for European Union. She is based in Zurich in Switzerland and her field of work include covering human rights violations which take place in the various countries in and outside Europe. She also reports about the political situation in European Union. She has worked with some reputed companies in Europe and is currently contributing to USA News as a freelance journalist. As someone who has a Masters’ degree in Human Rights she also delivers lectures on Intercultural Management to students of Human Rights. She is also an authority on the Arab world politics and their diversity.

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