a secluded and narrow Serpentine, somewhere in the hills of the Sauerland region, decelerates to a young man on his motor scooter in front of a black hole. It is powerful in the late afternoon sun, is infinite, but besides him, this thing looks not a person. Toms* skin tingles. It is so far, then a maw pre-requested, eats his Knowledge, all of the security, and then him self. He Well is rowing with the arms and slowly opening the mouth to a: “.”

formulated Simply, he has forgotten the way. To wanted a Snack, he, the range is but so far only two-, three hazards, it is not enough for a Recall. Tom, 23, learned only over the long-term memory, he must memorize everything again and again until it fits. Formulated in a complex manner, he is disabled according to the authorities, German “soul”. You mean, someone pinched him change arg to an inner place that is so hard to grasp is how this black hole. Tom is struggling with what happened once until now. Because he does not know now to go under the world for a Moment. He hates these panics.

Sexual abuse

Okay. It was not planned that way. So To Restart. He puts on a Smile that he often makes. It is to act happy. He is looking up. To the rear. “We go first straight ahead.”

year long abuse

As the police, Tom (3) exempt, he ate The Odyssey ends before Hunger the Wallpaper from the wall

in front of a white Mass, low and narrow. The Snack remained untraceable, out of reach. Tom rises and plods a dark corridor, behind the second door on the right to be rich in Black-and-Yellow begins. Here are the Borussia ruled: bed linen, game, a poster and a Flag in the club colours of the Dortmund football club.

The star went to see Tom for the first time in about eleven years, when his foster parents. At the time he was eleven, and his room is full of plush. 15 stuffed animals, six baby animal posters and always a feeding bottle on the bedside table that had to be. Today, standing next to his bed in the residential group 2 residential building “Teresa”, always a bottle of coke. The tolerate, the broken intestine.

Tom was three and a half, the youth welfare office from his “family of origin” was repeated, and in the care of the foster family. Before the police freed him at the time, Tom ate Hunger the Wallpaper from the wall. His left ear was deaf and injured from the blows to his abdomen from sexual abuse. He could just walk three steps, and knew about 30 words, and felt no more pain. The nervous system had switched over to emergency operation. “In the acts of the Jugendamt, only that he had been neglected,” recalled at the time, Anke Müller*, Tom’s foster-mother.

About 20 years ago now that Tom to the Horror of his first years of life escaped. How is it after so long of a man whose life began so? Tom sat on the edge of the bed, and the Playstation launched, as Timo* and Tobi* come to visit. In an instant, the three peers mess up Tom just shrugs and behind the ear summarizes the talk: “I’m in the Clash Royale, a new Level is to be achieved.” – “In Fifa you have manipulated the players, are my very, very slowly.” – “Tonight’s the fries.”

Timo suffered as a Baby, a skull-brain Trauma, because the father shook him too much, Tobi, died of thirst as an infant almost in addition to the depressive mother. Now, he runs like in a cell, gesturing with the arms, as he steps wordlessly with a Ghost. Tom rises. Smiles and hums, approaching him, “let mumbling now” and Tobi holds. Shake your head and pulls out his cell phone, and buries the view. Tom can be with the two of them. He is ticking as you. If the maintainer with Timo and Tobi didn’t come out right, because she grabs Jack or excitement to you, call Tom. Also to the two girls in the other group, the zoffen often. Crash kids like him.

He is good-natured and shy. New is it> suspicious

kid falls out of moving car

Horror-scenario: This can happen if the child seat is not properly attached

Tom got to the Miller’s a new family. They could not have children and had opted for the “care” that went fast. Soon they realized that something was wrong. Constantly chair from Tom’s Butt leaked, up to 15 diapers, you had to kill him on the day. His only sentence was: “After the Dortmund food to go.” Later, they learned that it earlier an aunt had to be taken back to McDonald’s. And they got further indications of abuse, as Tom painted the Wallpaper of his room with genitalia. Because they were fed the boy, caressing and kissing him, and he got to run and talk.

The injuries resulted in a brain – development disorder, and more you knew it; with the school, the required closed spaces, concentration and memory, and could tolerate the bad. On graduation Tom failed. All of this with people is such a thing. Earlier, he got caught in a thicket of zweifelndem suspicion and blind faith, was always on the alert, and threw himself in the next Moment, strangers to the neck. Today, all of that is mitigated, but still he is good-natured and shy at the same time. New him suspect. A new football game on Timos Tablet? “Nothing for me”, and calling it.

The other two delve in it, for Tom, they’re gone now, far, here, all sitting on the same bed. What Tom thinks about himself, about his wounds? “I’m fine, everything is fine.” And about his mother at the time? “Oh, don’t even know how that looks, I’m not interested in, don’t want to see you.”

Black holes

helped Him the love of the Miller and psychotherapy, which began before puberty. With her, he found words for what had happened to him. “I used to hate, had to get out. But then it doesn’t work. I Packed away.” A few years ago, he adopted the family name of the Miller, “then it was for me with earlier”. Moved in two and a half years here in the residential home for people with disabilities, 30 kilometers away from the Miller. He comes to a standstill. Maybe he would have his mother doch time you want to meet. “But just to ask if I still have more siblings.”

It darkens slowly. The three give yourself the gift of Cola. Tom drinks in the evening also like a energy drink that makes him tired. He needs a lot of sleep, because the world, the other follows him a hard stroke.

After ten hours of bed rest, he refuels. “Get out now, gotta shower!”

transport accident

Incredible luck: This Boy has more than Take a guardian angel

“but not back to the phone, silly!”

This had happened to him the other day, he knows why he was in the shower was on the phone. Sometimes he’s in the shower for over an hour, that’s what he needs.

Tomorrow, he says, he will look after the sows, “two thrown”. Tom works in agriculture in a workshop for people with disabilities, in the fresh air, without Close or a lot of irritation, “I like it very much”. He doesn’t need calming psychotropic drugs. Only the black holes, he can’t get away.

it is Never his suffering, it was diagnostically correct. What is Tom at the beginning of his life, depth has left until today a measurable chemical traces, its hormonal balance changed and even his genes are affected.

Toms, the body remains at the risk programmed

on the track, no car, a man with thick brows in a laboratory, an hour of Tom’s Dorm. A deep fridge, he takes out a thimble-sized piece of cotton wool and put him in a device that looks like a printer. The centrifuge is jerky until it is a liquid extracted price – Tom’s saliva.

Robert Kumsta, 40, a Professor of Genetic psychology at the Ruhr-University of Bochum, has heard of Tom. He has an idea. The saliva in a plastic plate with 96 wells poured therein antibodies. Immediately they turn dark yellow. Kumsta nods.

The proteins react to the hormone Cortisol: the brighter yellow, the more of them present. Tom’s saliva sample was early taken in the morning after Waking up and has far less Cortisol than the statistical average, people of this time. “Cortisol is a stress hormone, it energy resources, mobilizes the responsiveness increases and helps to keep track,” says Kumsta. It is also distributed in the morning in order to prepare the body for the day. But why is Tom from the Cortisol less than others?

Text against sexual abuse

This poem of a young Indian woman you need to hear

The small child, Tom, the risk provided location to ensure that it is produced by Cortisol in the duration of stress. The Gene NR3C1, which controls the Regulation of Cortisol secretion, was inhibited in its activity. And Tom is programmed physiologically to today, to experience life as a threat: Because the stress hormone raft in the duration of a fire through the body, it reduces in the brain, the Hippocampus, the control center of our emotions and memories. And the Amygdala has expanded, it has the task to detect threats, and now connects a lot with anxiety. The result is that people are fearful and excitable, and they appreciate the dangers worse. Everything will be suspect.

it has Finally fought back to Toms body. He’d have to actually pay out too much Cortisol, it has ramped up production overall down – therefore in the morning the lower cortisol content. And therefore, Tom is hard to get out of bed.


Kumstas field of research is called epigenetics. “Epi” comes from Greek, meaning “above” and describes how experiences change the DNA sequence of a human, but slightly “above” the genes. Methylation, the chemical changes that influence the activity of genes. For some, the activity is greatly reduced, as is the case with NR3C1, which contains the Blueprint of proteins, which are important for the control of the Cortisol release charge.

The research field is young. Still, neurologists, molecular biologists, psychiatrists and psychologists are at the beginning. “The epigenetics introduces a paradigm shift. It brings together what has been separated, thinking of each other,” says Kumsta.

Self-generations are related to each other. First studies were in the zero years: parents share their experiences about molecular biological processes to their children. At the University of Zurich, for instance, researchers mice in the Stress-exposed and discovered-modified RNA. This planted the scientists “unloaded” mice. They then showed the same stress symptoms as the afflicted.

Or the hunger winter of 1944/45 in the Netherlands: The German army held the country occupied and blocked food deliveries. Thousands starved to death. Women who were in this last winter of the war pregnant, brought underweight children to the world. The effect is epigenetic in nature. The children remained smaller and required less energy. They were poled to the fact that the nutrients in an optimal manner. Later, when the Emergency was over for a long time, suffered from them as adults are becoming increasingly Overweight and cardiovascular diseases; the epigenetic corrective had no more sense, and led to disorders, and these health risks were well inherited to the child – obesity in grandchildren in 2019 because of the Nazis in 1944.

In the laboratory, Kumsta strips, disposable gloves, and washes his hands. “I don’t think there is sometime a drug, the genes just turn on again.” A maximum of medicines from the epigenetic research might even support healing processes. “The key is to stay in Traumatized early intervention and to build them a stable environment.” The Professor himself is addiction in the genes for protective factors, according to a resilience in the DNA. But in the end, Kumsta remains, if he leaves the test tubes behind and climbs the stairs to his white-painted office, what he is: a psychologist.

“problems, not welding.”

With the Miller Tom had great luck. Quickly everything turned around him. Klaus Müller* gave up his Job as a Maritime teacher, navigated now his foster-child, Anke Müller worked full-time in a public authority. Until today, both pay for their commitment with a high price.

“Raunz at me like that!” Just Müllers have been looking for in the car only a Parking space, the nicely renovated market sweet talk, and now burns in the air. It was divided over the Turn. “You know better”, will slip out of it, Anke Müller, her husband, clutching the wheel and watching silently forward like a stormy sea. Anke müller’s view. She is usually level-headed, the sound of her husband then also. But the pulse is too high, Tom came today in the Morning is not high, it is late, today is an important day.

Later, they will say that they come out with their relationship hardly to rest. For two and a half years, Tom has moved out now, “but the financial, organizational and psychological pressures remained”. The friends, who had not reported because of the “difficult child” at some point, stayed away. With the silence, the tension gave way. “For me, it went perfectly,” Klaus Müller, 61, to summarize, “I have formed a tank and everything moved away in order to protect Tom.” And Anke Müller, 60: “I was beamed away. And sometimes I was driving his tank.” Both: “We lead a excessive demands on the budget.”

Anke Müller suffered a few years ago, a Burn-out. Tom asked on a daily basis, whether the foster parents are doing him Evil, and he bucked therefore, and provoked, trying not to take it personally. But at some point, it was her. “When my husband, however, everything is not just about Tom, and without Stress.”

she Thought about a separation? “I would have had a guilty Conscience, the problems would have been Yes.” So a lot of you have made together through. The love was never gone. Only you hid under the mountain of everyday life. “I’ll say this: the problem is not welding.”

Finally, a Parking lot is found. The three Miller rush to the paved road up to a Gothic Church, the corpus Christi procession begins, with Tom as the winner of the young Kolping banner. The orange letter K on a black fabric base, the sign of a Catholic social Association, works hard and down to earth in this to the sky, fleeing construction. Friends had Tom never. There are few recreational opportunities with peers in the Church.

Posttraumatic stress disorder

Klaus Müller for the last seat, because a child draws a hand on his Arm. Ben* looks like eight, and he is 13. The first five years of his life he spent without love, is now struggling in a foster family with a post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) of soldiers in the war. While the organ booms, around freaking out Ben on the bench, not holding still. Klaus Müller helps the foster parents, accompanied Ben three times a week to school, and when the Boy could no longer bear it there, go into the forest, he calms down very quickly. Tom is in the front, next to the Altar. Now the train is in motion. Solemnly, looking straight ahead, along, Tom, the long nave of the Church. As he passed the two, will Ben reach for Tom, he is waving. But Tom does not leave, looks.

a photo project against abuse

This four and a half minutes to go under the skin

Not only to Ben Klaus Müller takes care of, tired of wrinkles framing his face. Up to three times a week he goes to Tom’s Dorm, look to the Right. “As Tom there, moved in, it was said: We will take care of us,” he says. But he quickly realized that Tom was there “taken care of”. “There is hardly talk, hardly promote – it’s many things, is not difficult as a ‘case’.” Also, the Department of social services had, with Tom’s 21. Birthday is responsible, him to “just disabled” demoted and refused to accept numerous grants from the welfare office like care. Miller’s a to jump, care and benefits-in-kind, with several Thousand Euro in the year.

Also the maintenance of the scooter Klaus Müller takes care of itself, “even though I’m formally from each jurisdiction to get out”. Each new trip he, Tom, five, six Times to remember. It sometimes seems as Klaus Müller have a yourself, come out of the shell difficult to get out. The bells are ringing hard. Holding hands, Anke and Klaus are leaving the Church.

animals don’t talk like people. Does prevent good for him

The next Morning Tom over an inanimate thing in Pink. He is in the barn of the farm, the workshop for people with disabilities. “The Pig has it devoured overnight,” he says quietly, “the pig was sick.” Now Tom must make a “nice order”, the carcass of the farmer is increasing, while Tom is cleaning out, and the remaining 15 piglets to the Sow pushes, a battle for the 14 teat begins.

Since Yuri neighs loudly from the neighboring stall. Tom and Yuri, the understand. The young gelding is considered to be stubborn, can often anyone, but the degree with the tail to the front of the Box. “The turn.” Tom goes to him. “Cool, Cool,” he mumbles casually. Yuri snorts, and leaves Tom to his side, and as in the case of a slow waltz, you Pitter-patter a 180-degree turn.